[ Oh, man, he gets an alien cat to defend him? That's so not fair! It's almost like they're given the parts to make these things because they can be useful and faithful companions.

He's putting a pin in that for later. Maybe the cons of being responsible for more living things could be outweighed by having something to help him argue. So yeah, Tucker kind of stumbles on his momentum when Melody pops up, which... sort of kind of puts a damper on the hostility. He's still mad, but he kind of knows it's not strictly because he's mad at Wash, per se. Or he kind of is. Look, ten minutes ago, all he had to immediately worry about was the fact that some dumbass handed Caboose a grenade again. Now he's just really confused. ]

Yeah, thanks for that. I especially liked the big flowery speech about how our friend abandoned us before you decided to do the same thing. What's the point of all those drills if you can't even get up and run towards a fucking cave? [ Lavernius Tucker's guide to gratitude: displace all of your issues onto one singular issue whether it's correct or not, be mad about it instead of saying a sincere thank you, ??????, profit. This is why you're an asshole, Tucker. Never question it. ] Now we have to train an army full of idiots who all think we're real soldiers, so we can maybe go in and rescue our idiot friends sometime this century and maybe win a war. Nothing says victory like me, Caboose, Grif and Simmons being in charge of people. That's why we all had such great military careers!

[ He missed you, Wash, I swear. ]