Mark I - ||video||

[the_mechanic]

[There's a close-up view of a well-manicured goatee, though there's a bit of blood around the lips, and as he adjusts the camera, it's plain to see that the clearly-attractive man has definitely been in a fight recently. Put mildly. And also that he's wearing some kind of metal armor suit thing, with the face-mask open.

He opens his mouth to speak, then closes it again. Twice. This is not a man accustomed to being at a loss for words.]

Please tell me there's someone in this sparkly-rainbow-nightmare than can get a full sentence out, with minimal KUPO, that can tell me what the hell is going on?

...please?

[The camera pans out just enough to show the komory bat perched on the top of the man's head, chittering away happily. Tony swipes at him half-heartedly, as if they've been through this a few times already, and the bat makes no motion to vacate his vantage point.

Tony looks pleadingly into the camera, and with a deep sigh, cuts the feed.]

Comments

[unrecovered]

You're in a dream world. Yes, it's real. No, nobody's figured out how to wake up yet. No, nobody knows how we got here or why we're here either.

And that bat either thinks you're its mother or its best friend. It's not going to leave you alone.

[As if to illustrate the point, Wash's bat, Fang, swoops in and lands on Wash's shoulder, squeaking excitedly at the feed. Hi hi hi!]

[the_mechanic]

[The bat on Tony's head starts chittering away, wings flapping in emphasis. Oh hi oh my gosh he's so shiny isn't he I just can't even...

Tony kind of groans and glares up at his eyebrows, then rolls his eyes back down to focus on Wash.]

Awesome.

[unrecovered]

[Fang keeps on squeaking in earnest. I know right? Fang's person is shiny too! Maybe the other bat's person can join Fang's person and his friends and they can all be shiny together!]

[Wash just shrugs, and Fang squeaks again, going along for the ride.]

They grow on you. Plus, they're pretty good in combat.

[the_mechanic]

[Tony's bat (as yet unnamed) harmonizes along with its chatter. Yes all the shiny oh yes it will be fun and beautiful. Is your person nice?

Tony chuckles, trying to keep the panic from surfacing. It's just a damn chittery colorful bat, he's lived with worse, he can handle this.]

Like a fungus, I bet.

Combat, right, they have evil twins ready to eat my face, so I've been informed.

[unrecovered]

[Yesssss and they come in all colors too! Blue and purple and tan and now your person is red and it'll be great! A rainbow of shiny persons! The squeaking subsides for a moment as Fang ponders and answer to that question. Yes, he is! As long as other people are nice too. He's not nice when other people aren't.]

Something like that, yeah.

You haven't run into the Nightmares yet, have you. [And his armor doesn't look to be in great shape - between that and his face, it's probably safe to say this guy recently lost a fight, or was at least in one.] Is your armor in good enough condition for combat?

[the_mechanic]

[Tony's bat makes the komory equivalent sound of squeeeeeeeeeeeeeee to the point where Tony actually startles at the sound and finally manages to swipe the cretin from his helmet. It lands on his shoulder again and resumes happy shiny color small talk.

...Nightmares. Tony is intimately familiar with nightmares, but not the physical manifestation of them. If anything, he's actually looking forward to it, in a cathartic sort of way. And hahahah, his armor. Ugh.]

Not yet. And no, not at the moment. Needs a charge and apparently electricity is sketchy around here.

[unrecovered]

[Wash pulls back a bit too. Bats around here use high-pitched sounds as an attack and he does not need that kind of damage on his armor. He jostles the shoulder that Fang is perched on.] Hey. Whatever you're telling it, quit it.

[Fang squeaks in affirmation and gets back to his conversation. Hey, maybe they should keep it down a bit? You're hurting his person's ears.]

Talk to Luna about that - she's pretty good with that sort of thing.

...she's also a talking blue unicorn. [He's just gonna leave that there. Good luck processing.]

[the_mechanic]

[Tony's bat is noticeably more subdued. Sorry! Sorrysorrysorry... Tony knows the difference in tones, somehow. Oy.]

Hey, just don't do it again, ya dingbat. [He gets chittered at in response, and rolls his eyes.

Wheeeeeee, ponies.]

I'll... do that.

[He just blinks a few times. Welp. This was definitely going to be an adventure.]

[unrecovered]

[Heeeeey it's okay! Fang's person is just grumpy sometimes, that's all.]

[Yeeeeeah Wash is familiar with that reaction, given he had it himself.]

It's a lot to take in all at once.

[the_mechanic]

[Yeah. Pretty much nothing will ever surprise him again after this escapade, he's sure of that.

Tony's bat is getting the distinct impression his person might be very similar.]

Yeah... And I'm getting the distinct impression that talking ponies won't be the end of the weird, here.

[unrecovered]

[Hear that? That is the short, unamused laugh of someone who's been here since the beginning and has seen everything.]

No. Not even close.

[the_mechanic]

[Tony wipes a hand down his face as if he can drag the headache away with it. Of all the alternate universes, he ended up in a dream. Well. It's actually a hell of a lot better than his usual dreams. And that's kind of terrifying.]

Welp. Guess I have something to look forward to, then.

[He chuckles and shakes his head. His bat launches off his shoulder to resettle on top of the helmet, chittering his approval. He likes it better up here. Tony just sighs.]

[unrecovered]

You could put it that way.

This place has a habit of pulling people from different...well, people say "worlds," but the best I can figure is different dimensions. There's different species, different levels of technology, different kinds of magic - a little bit of almost everything, from what I can tell.

Believe it or not, you get used to it.

Figured out a name for the bat? [Because it's pretty obviously sticking around.]

[the_mechanic]

[Also something Tony is familiar with, though his experiences have been with people/armies coming to his "realm" on purpose.]

Yeah, for better or worse, it's not a foreign concept.

[He's actually terribly fascinated by the 'different technologies' bit and might truly be looking forward to getting his hands on it all. Just to see what might be relevant to his interests.

Right. This damned bat.]

Dingbat.

[As if it knows, the bat chirps and preens, fluttering its wings. Apparently it find the name satisfactory.]

...well as long as you approve. [Tony rolls his eyes but reaches up to scritch the bat underneath one of its wings.]

[unrecovered]

[Wait, what?]

You're used to people from other dimensions, but ponies and magic are still a shock. [That doesn't make sense.]

[He blinks, and Fang squeaks in surprise. Really? You're okay with that?]

Huh. [Wash shrugs.] Well, mine named himself too. This is Fang, and Melody is- [That's when Melody the Necho Cat jumps into Wash's arms, and he fumbles for a moment before he supports her.] -right here, evidently.

[the_mechanic]

Magic isn't a shock, I've just had really bad experiences with it, and no amount of dealing with Nordic mythos come to life or alien armies powered by a magical cube could prepare anyone for talking technicolor ponies. That is a whole new level of mindfuck.

[Not that at least one of them hasn't been absolutely lovely, another downright tolerable, and the third.... spastic as hell, but mostly harmless... just... no. He was not prepared.

Also, this is a guy who named his first creation Dummy and showers down verbal abuse out of affection. The bat got off easy. Dingbat chitters in approval. He got scritches out of the deal. Oh, another new friend! Hi hi!]

Huh. Yeah, I'm not the best at naming things, whatever comes to mind first just ends up sticking. He doesn't seem to mind.

[He shrugs, and the bat just preens.]